5 Things You Should Avoid Discussing on the Phone

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At the beginning of any relationship, couples often feel like they need to get to know one another as quickly as they can. This often leads to endless conversations about anything from childhood memories to retirement plans. There are some topics that you want to avoid at all costs when you’re talking on the phone.

1. Dating Other People

You never want to ask the person that you are dating if they are dating other people. Sure, it is an important question, but by asking it over the phone, you cannot evaluate their body language. By asking this in person, you can watch their body language to look for the tell-tale clues that they are lying or holding back the truth.

2. Children and Marriage

Of all the subjects you do not want to broach on the phone, perhaps these are the most important. The topic of marriage and children are too precious of an issue to bring up on the phone — especially if the relationship is still new. You would be surprised to learn how many men and women alike get turned off when this subject is brought up too soon in the relationship.

3. Asking About Previous Relationships

We know you may be curious about your new partner’s past relationships. You want to know how they met, why it ended, and everything else in between. These topics aren’t good for a budding relationship because your partner will begin to suspect that you are insecure and you’ll be comparing yourself to their ex. The only thing you need to know about that relationship is that it is over. If you do feel like you have to inquire about the ex, you never want to do it via the phone. You will have to wait until you are together and alone — the conversation is of a delicate nature and neither you or your partner may be prepared for what will come up.

4. Insecurities About Posts and Pictures on Social Media

As social media becomes a bigger part of our lives, there are more opportunities for couples to get into arguments over these things. For example, you may be mutual friends with someone and when they post a “sexy” picture your partner likes it, it can open a whole big can of worms. Or, perhaps your partner might post something that indicates something about the relationship. Your first impulse may be to call them and argue on the phone, or worse yet, post a common on the offending post/picture, berating your partner on social media.

5. Insecurities About Their Interest in You

Any new relationship will have periods of doubt and concern. You may feel like you don’t know if they are still interested in you if they don’t reach out to you for a few days. You don’t want to talk about this on the phone because it could feel like you are attacking them. Instead, wait until the next time you see one another. Just keep in mind not to ask them if they are still in to you as soon as you sit down, but wait an hour or so. Also, you don’t want to broach the subject in a confrontational tone. You can say something like: “I know we are still getting to know one another. I really like you, and I just wanted to see if we are still on the same page.”